invitation misunderstation
by Idreamofcomedy
Summary: portia appears on the ss tipton & her plan to get rid of bailey leads her to imagine herself as cinderella.


**London (preparing something): you, suck in that gut. You, stand up straight, & you, (woody): wipe that dumb look off your face.**

**Woody: but London, this isn't a dumb look, it's just my face.**

**Mr. Mosby (coming in): ok. What is going on here? As to…. Oh, I don't know STEERING THE BOAT! (the captain runs off)**

**London: look, Mosby we have a very important guest flying in soon.**

**Mr. Mosby: oh, your father?**

**London: no, not daddy. Portia! It's the first time we're seeing each other in person since…… (10-second pause): ….ever. & when she comes (hands Mr. Mosby $100): give her this. (whispering): it's to pay for her flight here.**

**Mr. Mosby: of course it is. (she comes): welcome aboard, Portia.**

**Portia (takes the 100): thanks. (whispering to London): tough mangier.**

**(opening credits)**

**Bailey (to Portia): so, you're London's rich friend?**

**Portia: yep. & you're one of London's Poor friends with bad taste in clothes?**

**Bailey: I guess that's me too.**

**London: I say we have a party in the fiesta room tonight.**

**Mr. Mosby: but it's supposed to be Macarena night. (Portia hands him $500): Macarena night can wait. (leaves)**

**Marcus: yeah. & I could pick out some dancing songs to DJ.**

**Zack: & I could help you.**

**Cody: & I could cook. I make a mean bean dip. (grinding teeth): a mean bean dip that nobody tried the last time I made it.**

**Zack (to Cody): let it go.**

**Woody: yeah. & I could help you.**

**Bailey: & I can…….. & I can……**

**Portia (to bailey): & you could help decorate.**

**Bailey: & I could do that.**

**Portia: & we could make the guest list.**

**(later)**

**London: then it's settled. The ones who are coming are Mrs. Tutwiler, Mr. Mosby, Kirby, Woody, Marcus, Zack, Cody, & bailey.**

**Portia: you know, London. Bailey is one of your closest friends, right?**

**London: we are pretty close.**

**Portia: so, why not disguise bailey on the list with a name like poor country girl?**

**London: I like that idea.**

**Portia: good. (to herself): sorry, bailey but get ready for denied entrance to the party. **

**(later)**

**Cody: hey, Kirby.**

**Kirby: hey, Cody. It's just you & bailey I have to check in & then I can go too. Go on in.**

**Cody: thanks. (goes in)**

**Bailey (coming in): hi, Kirby.**

**Kirby: hi, bailey. (looks down at list): oh, sorry bailey.**

**Bailey: what do you mean?**

**Kirby: you're not allowed at this party.**

**Bailey: what? There must be some mistake. I'm one of London's best friends. Well, not best friend. But---**

**Kirby: sorry, bailey. I'm afraid you're just gonna have to go back to your room.**

**Bailey (disappointed): ok.**

**Kirby: sorry. (giddy): it's party time.**

**(at dorm)**

**Bailey (to herself): oh, London. How could you forget to invite me to this party? (falls asleep & dreams)**

**London & Portia (screaming from off-screen): BAILEYRELLA! (bailey wakes up confused): BAILEYREALLA!**

**London: don't just stand there we're going to be late for the ball!**

**Portia: hurry up now, baileyrella (with London): & be quick about it! (bailey fetches their wraps)**

**Portia & London: don't we look beautiful?**

**Bailey: well……**

**Portia & London: of course we do!**

**London: the prince is so going to notice me!**

**Portia: I guess, but he's more bound to notice me & then he is to notice you.**

**London: which one of us do you think he'll notice, baileyrella?**

**Bailey: uh, I'm sure he'll notice both of you. (Portia & London giggle): no matter how hard he tries not to.**

**Portia & London: what was that?!**

**Bailey: nothing. Nothing.**

**Mrs. Tutwiler (coming in): come along, girls. We shall not be late for the ball. (Portia & London run up but Bailey gets stopped)**

**Bailey: you said "girls."**

**Mrs. Tutwiler: yes. & I meant MY girls. You, Baileyrella. Will dance tonight as well. (hands her a broom): don't forget to dance with the sponges, the mops, & the feather dusters also. (leaves): tata.**

**Bailey: first I'm not invited to Portia's welcome aboard party, & now I'm not even invited to a ball? Why doesn't anyone want me at a dance?! (cries, then Zack Appears): Zack?**

**Zack: no, I'm your fairy godfather.**

**Bailey: godfather? Aren't you supposed to be my fairy godMOTHER?**

**Zack: well, she's in fairy world sick. So, (points to self): I'm your only option. Give or take?**

**Bailey: I'll take.**

**Zack: that's the spirit. Now, what can you wear besides that barfbag of a dress? Oh, I know. (tries, but fails to do magic): hold on, hold on. They don't make (points to wand): these things like they used to. (tries again & does success): that's better.**

**Bailey: way better.**

**Zack: now, you obviously need some way to get to the castle.**

**Bailey: oh, now I get this. You're going to change a pumpkin into a carriage & some mice into horses?**

**Zack: no.**

**Bailey: then I don't get it.**

**Zack: this is the 21st century, baby. Stand back. (poofs Bailey to the castle): there.**

**bailey: wow. That was fast.**

**Zack" yes. Well, one more thing. You have to be out of there before 11:00.**

**Bailey: 11? Don't you mean midnight?**

**Zack: well, fairy godfather magic gets undone an hour earlier than fairy godmother magic. So, just remember & go have fun. (notices Bailey's bare feet): wait. Let me just get you some shoes, & THEN you can go.**

**Bailey: oh, & I guess you're just going to give me gold or even ruby slippers to wear to this ball?**

**Zack: ok, fine. (poofs up Glass slippers): THERE. Happy?**

**Bailey (satisfied): very. Thanks. (puts them on & goes)**

**(inside)**

**Cody: hello, beautiful maiden, shall we dance?**

**Bailey: Maiden? Cody, it's me. Bailey. Or in this weird world, baileyrella.**

**Cody: I have not heard of such a person. Now shall we dance? (sounding desperate): please?**

**Bailey: ok. (they dance until the strike of 11:00): oh no. (to Cody): Cody. I wish I could dance with you for a few more minutes, but I must go now. (starts to leave)**

**Cody (chasing bailey): beautiful maiden, wait! I don't know your name! (finds Bailey's glass slipper): ah-ha.**

**(meanwhile)**

**Bailey (comes back to Mrs. Tutwiler, London, & Portia): Mrs. Tutwiler.**

**Mrs. Tutwiler: that's stepmother to you, Baileyrella. & what have you been doing this whole time?**

**Bailey (looking at the broom): uh… (grabs it & starts sweeping): here sweeping the floor?**

**Mrs. Tutwiler: think again, baileyrella.**

**Portia & London (singsong): Baileyrella's gonna get it, Baileryrella's gonna get it. (bailey gulps nervously as the scene switches to her locked in a closet)**

**Mrs. Tutwiler (shouting off-screen): & DO NOT COME OUT UNTIL YOU HAVE TOUGHT ABOUT YOUR DOING!**

**Portia & London (singsong); Baileyrella really got it. Baileyrella really got it.**

**Cody (coming off-screen): who is the one who had danced with me?**

**Bailey (to herself): Cody. (looking at the ceiling): where are you when I need you, Zack---- I mean, my fairy godfather? (scene switches to Zack getting a massage at a spa in fairy world)**

**Zack (getting Massage): that's it, baby.**

**(scene goes back to Bailey)**

**Bailey (about where Zack is): unbelievable. (to herself): time to take matters into my own hands. (knocks down door)**

**Cody: is it? (fits slipper on bailey): it fits! (kneels down): oh, wonderful baileyrella, will you marry me?**

**Bailey (thinking): I can't get married I'm too young.**

**Cody: baileyrella? baileyrella? (we go back to bailey asleep): bailey? Bailey?**

**Bailey (snapping awake): ok! Fine I do! (realizes where she is): huh? (gets up): quick. Is my name baileyrella?**

**Zack: bailey-who?**

**Bailey: never mind, I just had a weird dream. & anyway, why are you all here? I thought you were all having fun at the party.**

**Woody: how could we be having fun if you weren't even there?**

**Bailey: if I wasn't even there? What do you mean? I wasn't even invited in the first place.**

**London: yes you were.**

**Bailey: huh? Ok. Now I'm really confused.**

**London: I must've forgotten to tell you that I gave you a special name on the guest list.**

**Marcus: who told you to do that?**

**London: Portia did.**

**Others: what?!**

**London: if you all mean "what" by there's a cat pie on his (Woody's) shoes, then I'm way ahead of you.**

**Woody: there's what on my shoes?**

**London: never mind.**

**(at the party)**

**Portia (to bailey): what are YOU doing at MY welcome aboard party?**

**Bailey: I'm here because I'm invited.**

**Portia: oh, please. You're just a poor country girl & you're nothing but one.**

**Zack (to the boys): that must be the name on the list.**

**Other boys: you think?!**

**London (about how Portia is treating bailey):unbelievable. (grabs a chocolate fountain): our friendship is so over. (acting): oh, no I am falling I hope that nothing happens to this $500 chocolate fountain with dress-staining chocolate when I do. (pours chocolate all over Portia): Oopsie!**

**Portia: London! How could you?!**

**London: this is not your welcome aboard party anymore.**

**Portia: oh, so I guess it's "party's over"?**

**London: yeah. For you.**

**Portia: FINE! (storms out)**

**London: Bailey. I'm really sorry I let Portia make it seem like you weren't invited to this party.**

**Bailey: it's ok, London. I'm just glad I was invited after all this.**

**Marcus: & now that you're here, & not Portia, let's get our party on! (commercial)**

**Cody (outside): some party, huh, bailey?**

**Bailey: yeah. (they are about to kiss as the clock chimes 12): oh, no. I have to leave (starts running off)**

**Cody: Bailey?**

**Bailey (turns head back): Got'cha!**

**Cody: oh. You got me there. (bailey runs back into his arms & they kiss as the episode ends)**


End file.
